Effective Leaders Are Active Listeners

Bill Ellis, 19C Leadership Development

leadership@md19clions.org

Get your printable copy of this letter here

The key trait of effective leaders and teams is being an active listener. Yet, few people are credited with being good listeners. Good listeners do not do multiple tasking, they listen,

There are five key elements of active listening. They all help you ensure that you hear the other person, and that the other person knows you are hearing what they are saying.

1. Pay attention.
   Give the speaker your undivided attention and acknowledge the message. Recognize that what is not said also speaks loudly.

   • Look at the speaker directly.

   • Put aside distracting thoughts. Don’t mentally prepare a rebuttal!

   • Avoid being distracted by environmental factors.

   • “Listen” to the speaker’s body language.

   • Refrain from side conversations when listening in a group setting.

2. Show that you are listening.
   Use your own body language and gestures to convey your attention.

   • Nod occasionally.

   • Smile and use other facial expressions.

   • Note your posture and make sure it is open and inviting.

   • Encourage the speaker to continue with small verbal comments like yes and uh huh.

3. Provide feedback.
   Our personal filters, assumptions, judgments, and beliefs can distort what we hear. As a listener, your role is to understand what is being said. This may require you to reflect what is being said and ask questions.

   • Reflect what has been said by paraphrasing. “What I’m hearing is…” and “Sounds like you are saying…” are great ways to reflect back.

   • Ask questions to clarify certain points. “What do you mean when you say…” “Is this what you mean?”

   • Summarize the speaker’s comments periodically.

4. Defer judgment.
   Interrupting is a waste of time. It frustrates the speaker and limits full understanding of the message.

   • Allow the speaker to finish.

   • Don’t interrupt with counterarguments.
5. Respond Appropriately.
   Active listening is a model for respect and understanding. You are gaining information and perspective. You add nothing by attacking the speaker or otherwise putting him or her down.

   • Be candid, open, and honest in your response.

   • Assert your opinions respectfully.

   • Treat the other person as he or she would want to be treated.

Key Points

It takes a lot of concentration and determination to be an active listener. Old habits are hard to break, and if your listening habits are as bad as many people’s are, then there’s a lot of habit-breaking to do!

Be deliberate with your listening and remind yourself constantly that your goal is to truly hear what the other person is saying. Set aside all other thoughts and behaviors and concentrate on the message. Ask question, reflect, and paraphrase to ensure you understand the message. If you don’t, then you’ll find that what someone says to you and what you hear can be amazingly different!

Start using active listening today to become a better communicator and improve your relationships.

Project Planning Guide

At the Zone Chairpersons roundtable it was suggested that I send out the Project Planning Guide that was presented in the last NW Lions Leadership Institute and in the officer training this year

This process allow thinking and planning to be done before action is taken in clubs, zones and district including for each office and chairmanship. We ask that you open the files and look it over. I think it can be the road to more successful experiences.

Download yours here

Yours in Lionism, Bill Ellis

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